Ah youth!

I hereby present my professional debut, ladies and gentlemen: Scenes from a UK TV series called Travelling Man, in which I play a young canal boy named Jamie.

I shot this in the summer holidays between my second and third year of drama school. I remember having absolutely no clue what I was doing, and because I had  only ever performed in the theatre until now and had no camera experience whatsoever, I thought it would be best if I remained as still as possible and do absolutely nothing aside from letting the lines slip monotonously from my pert young lips.  As a consequence I look and sound like a rather well-looking corpse with big hair.

But we live and learn, and it's always great to be able to look back and try to remember the person I was in those Daisy Duke shorts all those years ago.

Everything must go!

Tonight I had my annual games giveaway party.  This is where I invite round a bunch of friends, mostly ones who are around about my size, and we play games to determine the order in which people go up to racks of clothes and shoes and other desultory swag and free stuff I have been given that I no longer have room. need or desire for.  It's a very Robin Hood way of redistributing celebrity swag, all with a few drinks and some guacamole.

Tonight was a particularly good one, only a few things left on the racks after the hordes left.  We even give out swag bags to take home the swag in.  It is a very good feeling to a) see lots of friends b) give away things to people who actually like and want them c) be less encumbered with thingsand d) to laugh at how I came about owning certain weird items, like a pair of trousers from a Sylvester Stallone film and a stack of still-wrapped porn. Don't ask.

Also we have a bit of a tradition now at parties in my flat of taking a picture with me and my friends who used to be assistants and my present assistant.  See the vid below.

mailer and wizards

My friend Joe Mantegna (not the actor) has made a documentary about Norman Mailer which I can't wait to see. Luckily I don't have to wait cos a copy of it is sitting on my DVD player as we speak.  But here is the trailer to whet your appetites.

I have known Joe for ages. He first approached me after The Anniversary Party came out and asked me if I would like to direct a commercial. I said sure and so I did one and quickly found that commercials were not really my thing, though I did enjoy the one I did enormously.  I will try and put it up tomorrow. Joe has been a great supporter: of my short-lived theater company The Art Partyand whenever I have a fundraiser for any cause he is always there. I did the voice-over for his last documentary P Town Diaries.

 I am off to a wizard party in Brooklyn. I know, you couldn't make this shit up. I have a cloak and everything.

ask alan and some daily show

Alejandra from Tijuana, Mexico has included me in her first solo art show at the CECUT museum from October 1-4th. I am very flattered to be included in your 'inspiring people in the arts' themed show, Alejandra. Good luck with it!  Don't I look cute and pale and skinny?!

what would you be doing with your life now if you didnt become a movie star/brodway star? O and also, whats it like being in stage in front of all those people? wher you ever afrad, or naturaly born for it?  I would probably be an English teacher, with a focus on spelling. And I am always afraid.  The fear never goes away.  I think that is natural though, and good.

Jeff writes: Saw your show in San Francisco (in the same theater I interviewed you in for my gay youth site, before Suffering Man's Charity a while back). I was just curious about the genesis of "Beautiful." You mentioned it was written for a 96-year-old on her birthday? What's the full story? I'm intrigued. My friend Barnaby's dad wrote the song and it was a gift for a 96 year old lady and played for her at her birthday party. Considering the lyrics, imagine what a fun old broad she must have been!

From somewhere in Canada, Jennifer asks: What other things do you like to indulge in that would typically be reserved for our youth? You have a very youthful and playful spirit, which I adore. But you also seem to be very much about living for the moment... do you consider yourself a nostalgic person at all? I have to say I am obsessed with silly bands. I am on the set ofThe Good Wife right now and I feel so naughty because I have two on up my sleeve under my Eli drag.  One is a skateboard!! And I do live in the moment, or try to as much as poss, and as for nostalgia, well I like to look back and remember but I never think 'oh, that was a better time' or do that awful thing when people say things like 'Oh the clubs in NYC were so much better ten years ago, you missed it'.  I think that's such a boring and useless attitude.  Maybe they had more fun ten years ago, but that's their deal.  As Maude says 'L-I-V-E! Live!'

You said once in an interview that your stage persona is very different from your actual self.  How, then, did you select your songs for I Bought a Blue Car Today?  Did they speak to Alan Cumming the Stage Personality or the actual man? Hmm, what a clever, sneaky question. Well, my stage persona in I Bought A Blue Car Today is me.  I think I was referring in the interview to a perception of me because of some of the more crazy roles I have played. So, the songs definitely speak to me the man (and also the stage personality in IBABCT!!)

Kuriouscat sent this poem about Into The Night, the show I did for German/French TV with Ian Rankin...

Alan Cumming, your the King of quick Chatter,
a fast flowing river, of great slangish "patter"!
A saw your wee film, with Ian Rankin the writer,
your a wonderful duo, who couldnt be tighter!

My question to you, is very personal indeed,
where did you get, that hair-do on your heed?
I'd like a wee copy, of this napper art,
to sell off the blue prints, on my ebay cart!

You got a bit pished, going down tae the pub,
then into a chippy, for some greasy grub!
White pudding and chips, the best you can get,
except when its fritters, that one I can bet!

Its better when drunk, fingers not forks,
so how did it taste, as good as New york's?
You have to admit, its better out west,
The fritters in Glasgow are simply the best!

You looked a bit scared, when you went underground,
Hooks from the ceiling, were up there all around!
Torch lights were piercing, the tunnels of death,
Tell me the truth, could you smell any meths?

Excuse me "This is Edinburgh", you scoff!
okay ma wee darling, one more to round off!
At the end of the night, where your eyes really smarting?
now tell me the truth, wis it cos big Rankin wis farting?

i want to know more about your book.  please tell me/us more about it.  hey, have you ever been on craig ferguson's show?  i would love to hear you both discuss your crazy pasts in scotland.  My book is called Tommy's Tale and it's a novel about a party boy in London who decides he wants to be a father.  It came out in 2002/2003.  And I haven't ever been on Craig's show, strangely, but we go way back.  I first worked with him in his guise of Bing Hitler in the mid eighties.  Here I am on the Jonathan Ross show in the UK talking about my book and X Men2.

From Jane: Apart from those who you love, what do you miss most about Scotland and the UK when you are in America, and what do you miss most about New York when you are in the UK ?  I miss the Scottish sense of humour, and also the common references.  We have a bleaker, darker side to what we find amusing and I love being reminded of that. I also miss deep fried white pudding!!  And when I am away from New York I miss things like the man in Tompkins Square Park who only plays Somewhere Over The Rainbow on his sax, and the energy and the mouthiness of the people.

Mark writes: Jessica Lange is my favorite actress and I was just wondering what turned out to be the most surprising thing about her when you first met and got the chance to work with her?  She told me she washed her hair in a bucket, outdoors on her farm in Minnesota. That was pretty surprising!  And she has a tattoo on her wrist.

Dexter says hi Alan just wanted you to know that I am such a huge fan of yours and I would also like to thank you for your work against circumcision. I too think it's barbaric and unnecessary. In an age where most men don't speak of it for fear of embarrassment it is nice to see that you are so open with your intact status. I love your performances and I look forward to seeing you in more films. Yay, thanks Dexter, and may the foreskin be with you!

Here's how The Daily Show covered the Prop 8 decision this week. Hilarious. And look out for my lovely friend David Mixner...

poor honey

I wish you could see me right now. I am mountain man.  I have been in the forest sweating, chopping down big branches from fir trees, one of which was damaged in a storm last winter and I am only now getting round to tidying it up, poor thing.  I also dragged a load of branches into the woods and started to make a bivouac.  Now I know in America a bivouac means nothing, in fact I am sure it does not resonate much amywhere, but when I was in the Cubs and Scouts we were forever being sent into forests to make them and I discovered today that it's like falling off a bike. So I now have the beginnings of a secret little piney branch hut in the woods to go and hide in.  Woo hoo.

Also today I felt sorry for Honey who was panting in the heat, and I suddenly remembered that I have a set of clippers left over from my days of shaved headedness and so I gave Honey a lttle trim.  Sadly I forgot the golden rule about never going against the grain and she has a couple of weird patches on either side of her tummy. I thought about making them into her initials and renaming her MC Honey, DJ, producer and rapper, but I just left it.

OMFG, The Burlesque trailer is out, people.  Here it is.  And also a little interview I did for my friend Abe Gurko for his site I Mean What?

ask alan and behemoth

Woah, but before we get into ask alan, let's take a moment to rejoice at the Prop 8 decision today!! How amazing it is to hear sanity and justice and truth and kindness in relation to equality for gay people.  My favourite part of the decision is the judge's well-constructed and utterly invincible argument that marriage is not something that is entered into as only a means to procreate! There is no testing of your child-bearing potential when a marriage licence is given out so how can it only be applicable to a man and a woman, and how can it not be prejudiced to not allow a same sex couple to enter into that union? Of course the crazy, bigoted and scared religous fanatics have totally missed this key piece of the argument and are still ranting about the decay of the family unit and the danger to children and the future destruction of civilisation as we know it.

Get real, you stupid, ugly, hateful people. The train has left the station.  This is a great day not just for me, but for you too, because eventually the world will be a better place for ALL of us because love and kindness is being held up as something to celebrate, and your fear and shame is being deconstructed and revealed for exactly what it is. Come into the light, it's going to be okay.

Christina asks: which are your favourite artists, songs or albums?? Hihihihi, thanks in advance Alan dearest!!!  My favourite ever album in the world is The Kick Inside by Kate Bush. Anything by her is genius actually.

From Francesca: do you think that your life would be easier or more relaxed if you weren´t so (I don´t find a suitable word i´m sorry =)  ) famous ? I mean if you were a "normal" person that you could just walk down the street and there were not cameras everywhere. Do you think it would be easier or do you love that (or this ) =) I´m sorrythat my english is so bag ;)and i´m sorry that I´m so annoying You're not annoying.  It's quite an interesting question.  I think my life would be easier and more relaxed if i wasn't famous, yes.  Definitely.  There are a lot of extra stressful things that you have to deal with that 'normal' people don't. BUT, there are also things about being famous that allow you to experience great ease and to feel very relaxed that can combat the other stuff. That's my experience anyway. I sort of feel it's been my life so long that I just deal with it. And when it gets a bit weird I have a bitch on this blog about it and that lets off the steam.

Amanda from Pittsburgh is puzzled: How do you maintain such a positive and upbeat attitude?  Whenever I see you on TV in interviews and so on, you always seem so completely happy!  Do you ever get depressed?  If so, how do you get past that? Well Amanda, I keep my perky, cheeky chappy, elfin, pixie countenance by regular ingestions ofweird potions and placenta into my bum. I do get a bit down sometimes, I think that's essential. But it hasn't overwhelmed me for quite some time.

Barb writes: Why Obama.  don,t get me wrong , Bush wasnt a great ppresident either.   Is it because he supports gay rights?   AnywayI see most politians as con artists.  They say what they think the public wants to hear in order to get elected. And after I read your blog on The Wall St reform i went on line to find out more about it.  I think it will be a good thing but i don't think it thould be in the hands of the feds at least. i would also feel more comgortable if Mr Obama would really focus on getting the countries dept down.  Again sorry bout the spelling.     Ok enough bout politics.   I finally decided to email you because you seem to be a down to earth Person so Thought i give i!
t a shot .   I did have one question though ,   Im a bit confused you were married to a woman and now you are Married to a man which is it gay or bi just curious and u dont have to answer that. And one final thing , before i close.  I am a smoker and i noticed you smoke too.  I just wanted to mention that I found a great alturnative to it .  Its called an electric cigerette .   I used to smoke alot now i only smoke this and the only thing bad about it is nicatine is highly addictive, duh huh,  but its not a carcenagenic.  I get mine .  ant Vapeor4Life.com if you are interested.   Iguess ill bust but this out to the universe and cross my fingers I here from you.  and i know you dont believe but God Bless You yoiu bring alot of Joy and hoe to alot of people.
 Dear Babs, bless you.  I can't intellectualise my support of Obama. It is totally about a feeling of kindness and hope and truthfulness.  I think Obama thinks, as I do, that we should be kind to others and take care of those less fortunate than ourselves.  The alternative is to say I don't care about those who slip through the net and I only think of my own personal gain, and I just could never do that.

From Louis:  Thanks very much for your thoughtful answers to all my "authenticity" questions. As I say, I want to believe, and do. It's just the phoniness is so pervasive, so often inthe guise of authenticity (throughout politics, in mass media confessionalism, in the selling of a lifestyle to an entire cohort under the rubric of individualism). This is explicit in some of your show and probably implicit in nearly all of it.  My questions reflected the fact that one of the worst results is that it's conducive to cynicism about everyone. Kind of a Gresham's Law. Come to think of it, maybe it's OK to wonder a little about everyone's honesty as long as you don't dismiss it out of hand.  The other thing is that I'm not cultured enough to understand artifice. By which I mean I think the part of the show that I found "implausible" came just after the intermission when you and Lance Horne talked about having just been on Grinder with one of the sound guys in the theater. Somehow it sank in only in retelling this that it presumably was scripted (prepared... whatever -- not extemporaneous).  On reflection, I guess that makes it about as "dishonest" as makeup, lighting and rehearsal.  Let me rephrase that in what I hope is a more complimentary way: The show and you are so good that, among other things, I guess you confused me about the difference between life and performance.
I can see that -- as with many forms of art -- there may be pitfalls in how the gullible will understand you and the work. But this is a weak excuse for raising questions about the artist's intentions. Or so I imagine I'd learn in a freshman course.
Sorry to be so cluelessly ponderous about your excellent entertainment.  
Thank you so much, Louis. Really that is very complimentary.

Jeff : I was just curious about the genesis of "Beautiful." You mentioned it was written for a 96-year-old on her birthday? What's the full story? I'm intrigued.  My friend Barnaby's dad wrote it for the birthday party of a 96 year old lady. The song was her present.  And the fact that the word 'fuck' is used so often and for such good comedy gain in the song makes me think the lady would have been a lovely person to know.

I asked Meade to give more deets about his foreskin deal: Well, the main website ishttp://www.foregen.org/ .  The finances are transparent and the donation reports are available on the foreskin restoration forum http://Foreskin-Restoration.net/forum/showthread.php?t=5095.  Right now the 2010 trial needs a total of 100,000 usd and has a little over 3,000 as of the last report.  The donate link ishttp://www.foregen.org/donate/  There is also a later trial being looked into at CHUV in Switzerland.

Aww Beth is being very nice: I wanted to find an interesting way to tell you that I love your work, think you're terribly interesting, am always amazed at the new things you create and am just generally happy that your energy is in the world but i can't so the previous is all there is.  I also wanted to say that your 'Friday' post made me so sad that that is the trade off you have to deal with for all the things you do that I so dig. 
Anyway, I just wanted to say thanks for sharing your creativity -- I appreciate it.  Oh, and PS -- you always make the best faces in pictures.  I love them.  Laters.

Oh, and yesterday and today I was finishing off the reading of the audiobook of Behemoth by Scott Westerfield and here is a little vid Scott took when he came to visit us in the studio.

Angry people and me

I recently wrote a piece for a book. I had to write a letter to myself at age 16.

It was quite an interesting exercise.  Of course there is a lot one could say to oneself at age 16.  Lots of advice, lots of hints on how to avoid pain, crazy people, STDs.  But actually I believe that if we arrive somewhere in life where we are happy with ourselves and our lot, how can we have any regrets or wish anything in our past to have changed? For even the most awful, painful bits have contributed to the person you have become today, and therefore changing or wishing any of it had not happened would undermine or alter your present state of bliss.

I really do believe that, I think.  But of course, having the opportunity to write a letter to my little scared, unformed, 16 year old self got me thinking.  And I have to say, as I do in the letter which will be published in the book, that there is a person who played quite a large and very destructive role in my life that I think I could have happily not met and still ended up where I am now.

We all have patterns in our behaviour and our desires. Sometimes we don't even understand these patterns or become aware of them till many years later, perhaps even till after we have conquered them or broken the cycle.  I can see several patterns in my life and behaviour from this great old age of 45 looking back through the ages. The one I keep focussing on recently, since I wrote that piece, is that I have repeatedly tried to fix angry people. In some way I felt that I could help them, maybe even that their anger was my fault, and it was my duty to be with them and help them get better. Of course that is all a load of bollocks. It wasn't my fault that they were angry. It probably wasn't their fault either. But I would never be able to fix or change them, and in trying they would only make me miserable, and in one case try to destroy me.

The reason I did this was it was familiar. I grew up with anger, with a parent whose rage was so present that I thought it was normal, and that I could affect a change in for the better it if I tried really hard. Of course my attempts were probably red rag to a bull and made the situation worse, which I suppose led to a vicious circle of me trying harder and them being more angry and frustrated and taking that out on me, and so on and so on.

It was many years and several adult realtionships later that I saw this pattern and I stopped it.  And so I wish I had never met a certain young man at the after party for the first night of Titanic - the Musical in New York in 1997.  I wish I had walked away and notspent so many years trying to fix him and putting up with his shit. I think I would still be in the happy place I am now without that experience.

Maybe I should have known. I mean, come on. The show was called Titanic, after all.

frollick!

ah me. Today the poor make up lady on The Good Wife was very focussed on the monitor watching for little specks of glitter glinting in the light on Eli's face.  This is after she had to remove the glittery nail varnish from his nails.

I just got back from a lovely dinner for my friend David's birthday.  It was on the roof of his building and it made me feel so happy that I live in New York City.  I did have rather a lot of carbs long after the time I feel comfortable to do so but what the hell, you only live once, huh?!

Here is a bit of a behnd the scenes film from the Spice Girlsmovie, and then a weird display I saw once in Frankfurt airport...

The lie de feu

One of the great things about being on Fire Island is that it has very patchy cellular service and that, combined with the fact that to get there you must go on a ferry for half an hour and once you arrive there are no cars, makes for a real feeling of escaping from the rat race and being in a sort of bucolic queer culture bubble. I like it.

My show on Friday at the Whyte Hall was really fun. Thanks to everyone who came along and sorry to those who couldn't get in. This first picture on the right is of us rehearsing and working out the running order! I did a new song for the first time: Jerry Herman's I won't Send Roses from the musical Mack and Mabel. I sang it because Jerry Herman had donated the piano that Lance Horne played onstage with me, and also some of my happiest times on Fire Island happened in my late dear friend Beau Clarke's house, which had been previously owned by Jerry Herman. There was a loo that still had Jerry's zebra skin wallpaper and a framed award on the wall that he must have forgotten to take with him when he left.

Saturday was a blur of seeing friends and swimming and having a massage and eating delicious food looking at the ocean.  I know, exhausting, right? Last night was the huge Pines Party on the beach. It's an annual big dance party which benefits the Fire Island Pines Property Owners' Associaton Charitable Foundation and the the Stonewall Foundation.  So all in a good cause, and every year it is a real event. This year's theme was Poseidon, and there was a whole compund on the beach built to resemble the Lost City of Atlantis.

There were little tents where you could be covered in glitter, masseurs, dancing water nymphs in cages, and lots of dancing people having a good old laugh.  Right now I still have glittery nail varnish on and in the morning I am back to playing Eli Gold in The Good Wife.  Wouldn't it be funny if Eli was a secret raver?

more foreskin news

I am delighted to say my friend David Mixner has blogged about circumcision and my involvement with Intact America on his siteDavidMixner.com, and it has been causing quite a furor in the comments section. Discussion is the beginning of change, after all.

David is a really amazing man who has been a civil rights activist since practically stone age times.  No, really, he is a total inspiration and has been at it since Martin Luther King's time and was instrumental in the anti-Vietnam war movement and has been rabble-rousing ever since. Go to his blog and see for yourselves.

Talking of circumcision, I am playing Fire Island this weekend and the show is entitled Alan Cumming: Uncut. Yes, lttle do the burghers of the ile de feu know that they will be getting foreskin with their show tunes!  More tomorrow